When you’re forcing love to stay alive with someone, it isn’t love any more. It has become the fear of being hurt and alone. Clinging to love will be a lot more painful in the long run, and sometimes, you just have to know when to let go.
Getting your heartbroken is scary. Getting dumped is horrifying. Getting rejected is frightening. But nothing is scarier than the fact that you may have had nice love and you selected the absence of pain as an alternative.
It is perhaps easier to go through life being closed off to love. It is perhaps safer and it may be painless. It could be simpler. It might be less complicated. But it is going to actually be extra boring. More colourless. More lifeless. And an entire lot extra empty.
When your heart is breaking, just like the muffled sound of a distant gunshot. It would not physically pierce your skin or tear you to pieces, however the sensation is physically present – the paralysing discomfort of realizing that one thing you took for granted is leaving for good.
Although it’s hard to just accept at first, that is truly a good signal, having a broken heart. It means you may have cherished one thing, you have loved something, you will have tried for one thing, and you’ve got life educate you.
Life will try to break you down sometimes, nothing and nobody can utterly protect you from this reality. Remaining alone and hiding from the world won’t either, for limitless, stagnant solitude can even break you with unhealthy nostalgia and craving.
You have to stand back up and put your self out there once more. Your heart is stronger than you realize. I’ve been there and I’ve seen heartbreak through to the other side. It takes time and persistence.
You will have moments where you sob on the floor in your bedroom. Moments wear you tear up slightly but blink it away because you’re in public. Moments where your outward appearance looks calm and collected but your insides are crumbling. Every day you will feel differently and react differently than the day before. Don’t try to plan it out. Don’t try to understand it. Just let yourself be, let yourself feel, and let yourself heal.
Deep heartbreak is kind of like being lost in the woods – every direction leads to nowhere at first. When you are standing in a forest of darkness, you cannot see any light that could ever lead you home. But if you wait for the sun to rise again, and listen when someone assures you that they themselves have stood in that same dark place, and have since moved forward with their life, often-times this will bring the hope that’s needed.
It’s so hard to give you advice when you’ve got a broken heart, but some words can heal, and give you hope. You are stronger than you know!
Here 10 Uplifting Things To Remember When Your Heart is Breaking!
- The person you loved in the past, who treated you like dirt repeatedly, has nothing intellectually or spiritually to offer you in the present moment, but more headaches and heartache. You can mull it over and obsess and obsess about how things turned out – what you did wrong or should have done differently – but there’s no point. It will NOT change anything right now!
- Some chapters in our lives have to close without closure. There’s no point in losing yourself by trying to hold on to what’s not meant to stay. Someday you’re going look back on this time in your life as such an important time of grieving and growing. You will see that you were in mourning and your heart was breaking, but your life was changing.
- Life and God both have greater plans for you that don’t involve crying at night or believing that you’re broken. It’s always better to be alone than to be in bad company. And when you do decide to give someone a chance, do so because you’re truly better off with this person. Don’t do it just for the sake of not being alone.
- When someone rejects you it doesn’t mean you need to also reject yourself or think of yourself as less worthy. It doesn’t mean that nobody will ever want you any more. Remember that there are billions of people in the world and only ONE person has rejected you. And it only hurts so bad right now because, to you, that one person’s opinion represented the opinion of the whole world. But that’s not the truth. Sometimes it takes a broken heart to shake you awake and help you see that you are worth so much more than you were settling for.
- When you lose someone or something, don’t think of it as a loss, but as a gift that lightens your load so you can better travel the path meant for you. Anything that hurts you today only makes you stronger in the end.
- When all is said and done, grief is the price you pay for love. And it’s better to have loved, lost and learned, than to have never loved at all. A broken heart is just the growing pains necessary so that you can love more completely when the real thing comes along.
- You don’t have to have been in a relationship to be heartbroken. Your love isn’t invalid if it was not reciprocated. Your pain is just as real, just as strong, just as true. But at some point, in order to live and have experiences and open your heart up to new love, you have to acknowledge that the person you love does not feel the same way. It will suck. But with enough time, and with the right person who reciprocates your feelings, you will start to view that heartache as less of a shattered piece of glass and more of a fuzzy image that you can no longer make out as clearly.
- Love and pain go hand in hand. You cannot have one without the other. Either the love ends and you experience deep pain, or the love continues and you experience the lifelong pain of constant fear and worry over what you would do if you ever lost them. You therefore have the choice to view yourself as a prisoner of love, or as someone who was or is lucky enough to feel so much for one person that it actually hurts. The more hurt and suffering that you experience, the more you will treat your next love with as much gentleness and care and respect and tenderness that you can give.
- You don’t have to destroy the memories of the person who broke your heart. You don’t have to erase them from your life and pretend that they do not exist. In fact, you don’t want to do any of that, or else all this pain will have been for nothing. Just embrace the fact that you are going to hurt for a while, that you loved someone courageously and it did not work out, that you cannot regret anything or question anything because all you did was love and there’s nothing wrong with that. Learn from this experience, let your heart get even larger than it was before, and never let your heartache take you. Take your heartache, because you are more powerful than you think.
- Your mind and your heart are different. Your heart will not simply stop loving someone just because your mind tells it to. Embrace both your heart and your mind for the powerful things that they are, but don’t try to make one do the job of the other. Let your heart decide when it’s ready to be whole again, and let your mind guide you in the process.
You are human and the human heart breaks sometimes. Don’t fight it – fight through it!
Give yourself a chance to love again, to feel again, and to live again.
You are alive and here to risk your heart by putting it into something you believe in, as many times as it takes. If you avoid taking this chance, one thing is certain, you will make it safely to the end, feeling empty and unfulfilled.
Don’t do that to yourself. You deserve better.
To be rejected by someone doesn’t mean you should also reject yourself or that you should think of yourself as a lesser person. It doesn’t mean that nobody will ever love you anymore, Remember that only ONE person has rejected you at the moment, and it only hurt so much because to you, that person’s opinion symbolized the opinion of the whole world, of God.